My Year With Words

I paint pictures with words “poetry” purely as a therapy

In Dec 2016 I embarked on writing a book, purely by chance “I’ll have it done in a few months” I said. I put it out there in to the universe, so I would make it happen (if I say it I do it).

As part of my old job (the one I walked away from in 2012/2013) I wrote papers, documents, performed analysis from which I delivered strategies, roadmaps, structural revamps, reviews and think pieces. I reorganised, restructured, change managed, delivered solutions and problem solved with ease. So how hard could a book be?

I knew that I was equipped to write but I never realised the obvious that once I put my heart into the words it became another beast entirely. That beast is called art and when emotions are involved in the creation of anything then it becomes so much harder.

So the easy “book” took another form and taunted me with feelings of mediocrity that I had never felt before. But in those feelings it has set me free to find out that there is more to me and writing. I have dived deep into the problems many face in life to troubleshoot a different path.

The book is a guidebook to a more “prosperous and purposeful life”, yeah I know (ironic or what?). In writing this book I have rediscovered words and a love of writing poetry “my flow” and part of my purpose. I turned to poetry for therapy often when stuck. Initially I was hard on “my writing process” I have a muddled one. The poetry I decided was a distraction, an excuse not to write. Then my sister in-law and cousin both reminded me that the writing is the work. They both said “I know it’s not — the book! but you are writing and it’s good and that’s the main thing surely?”

I listened (quelle suprise) and thus I have turned my purpose upside down and realised that there are many strands and many paths you can follow if you are open and celebrate the discovery within the process.

Once I stopped giving myself a hard time and went with it “guess what” I made more progress. The book is nearly there “3 chapters left” and I am editing the others….

I am trying to write a poem a day (at least) sometimes more. I chuck them out quickly, I have decided that I want them to be rough and ready and if in the future I decide to edit or rework, I will.

I have not performed, taken any classes or guidance on poetry, I measure my progress mainly in real time and that is fun. It is all very free form and raw, but I’m not over analysing it, just going with the flow. I may venture out to a poetry cafe in a few months “I hear there’s a good one in covent garden/soho” to see how all of that works! But for now Medium is the audience I have chosen. I feel that I am growing every day that is just what life should be, a discovery of joy from within. I am just going to wait and see!

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